Death is a complex topic to discuss, and knowing what to say to someone that has experienced losing a loved one can leave you speechless. Upon hearing the news of someone passing away, you might offer condolences to those grieving by saying, “I’m sending you thoughts and prayers.” Known as a nod to the power and comfort of prayer, some people are OK with this phrase and appreciate it, while others see it as an overused default reaction that doesn’t feel genuine.
In any case, you can use other phrases to offer your sympathy and support. Here are ten alternative phrases to “Sending thoughts and prayers.”
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“I have so many good memories of _________.”
If you knew the deceased, share a story or a special memory about this person. It can be comforting for anyone grieving to hear a story about how much their loved one meant to someone else or how they made a difference in someone else’s life.
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“I am sad to hear about your loss.”
When you express your sadness to someone that is grieving, it can help that person not feel alone in their grief. It validates the emotions they may be experiencing.
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“I am here for you.”
Simply stating that you’re available anytime offers genuine support. Knowing you’re reachable can be very comforting to someone grieving. Even if the person grieving has expressed a need for space, they’ll still feel reassured knowing that you’re only a phone call away.
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“I’m sorry you’re going through something so difficult right now.”
If you’ve experienced grief, you can relate to its difficulty. When you express this to someone, you’re acknowledging the pain that someone grieving may feel. In addition, anyone grieving might find hope in knowing that someone they know has also gone through the same thing and eventually emerged from their grief to move forward.
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“The way you feel right now is OK.”
Anyone who’s lost a loved one may feel intense sadness, extreme anger, regret, and numbness. Big feelings can be scary and overwhelming. However, you can offer reassurance that it’s OK to experience a wave of these feelings and that, hopefully, those feelings will become more bearable with time.
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“You don’t have to talk.”
Sometimes offering a warm hug, holding hands, or sitting beside someone grieving is enough. But opening up your heart and listening gives someone grieving the space to speak freely about their feelings.
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“Grieving takes time, so I’m here for you to lean on.”
Letting someone know that everyone grieves differently and that there are no expectations when processing their grief is a great way to show your support.
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“I’d like to help you with___________________.”
Instead of wondering what to say or asking what you can do, suggest something you’d like to do and commit to doing it. There may be everyday tasks that someone grieving can’t bring themselves to do, or they don’t have the energy to deal with anything else amid grief. Tasks like picking up groceries, cooking a meal, or coming over to help with household chores can take some burdens off anyone grieving.
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“It’s hard to be strong right now.”
Those grieving may be experiencing the opposite of strong and feel expected to project a facade of strength. You can offer your support by explaining that it’s hard to be strong, it’s OK not to feel strong, and there are no expectations of strength.
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“I care about you, and I love you.”
“I care about you, and I love you are sincere words you can say to someone you know that is experiencing a loss. These words offer comfort and convey that you genuinely care about that person’s well-being.
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by the best team in the Milky Way